Innate Wholeness

What exactly do we mean by being present as a parent?

The focus here is to connect with our foundation – one of simply being. We do things all day long. We clean, we shop, we cook, we clean some more (or maybe not), we eat, we clothe the kids, we run them here and there. We are largely do-ers. Except that we’re not. The term for our species is human being, not doing.

Of course we have to do things and here we bring awareness to the fact that as we pay attention to who we are being as we parent we derive great benefit. Are our thoughts tied up in what we have to do after this task is completed? Or maybe we’re worrying about what went wrong earlier, or about the game next week? Possibly we’re frustrated about a disagreement with a loved one. Maybe it’s grumpiness, or sadness, or anger we’re feeling.

Truly, who are you being and how can you be who you want to be?

We all have a source of peace within, but it is easy to lose touch or even forget that it exists. Yet, we can begin by strengthening the connection to our source of Life through various processes and practices. In doing so, we cultivate the ability to be present.

In this sense, we expand on the common use of the term being present by defining it as an art that is practiced until it becomes an integrated skill. Much more than simply being physically present for our children, we are focusing on the ability to be fully present with our children as we parent them. This allows us to be free from distractions such as stress, worry, and negative feelings and to be full of the characteristics below.

Some qualities of a parent who practices the art of being present…

• listening without judgment
• connected to the source of Life
• giving children our full attention
• responding in a kind, loving manner
• allowing children their own experience of life
• meeting children where they are developmentally
• observing and nurturing the family’s natural rhythm
• solving conflict through compassionate communication
• honoring and nurturing a healthy connection with our children
• allow learning between parent and child, not just from parent to child
• encouraging appropriate behavior through modeling and loving guidance
• meeting children in the moment, free from past hurt and worry about the future
• acknowledging and allowing ourselves and our children to fully experience feelings

While the possibilities are unlimited, when the focus of parenting is with being present, there are many benefits.

Parenting with presence allows us and our children to…

• Provide space to explore, grow, and learn
• Be open for inspired ideas to come through
• Be fully who we are in all facets of our being
• Enjoy the relationship and family we have created
• Encourage everyone to be the very best they can be
• Recognize and use the power of the mind, body, and spirit as a whole
• Maintain an accepting, positive outlook for relationships, dreams, challenges (small and big), literally all of life itself
• Meet each moment of parenting (and life) with complete and pure attention, free from hurt of the past and worry about the future
• Contribute to the expansion of human consciousness and the well being of the planet

You will notice that we use the terms harmonious parenting and transformational parenting interchangeably with parenting with presence or being present. This is done to emphasize the fact that we are discussing a way of parenting that ultimately defies complete definition by words – it comes from a place of peace within. The result is a blend of acceptance, appreciation, joy, and enthusiasm for the parent-child relationship and the experiences that come through it.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 15th, 2009 at 9:23 pm and is filed under MM Collection. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.