Innate Wholeness

Not because it’s Valentine’s Day… just because you’re You.  Simply because you were born into this Earthly reality we all share and you are innately valuable.

I love the child within that comes out to play, wonder, and explore.  I love your creativity and your willingness.

I love your smile as it shines from the inside out.  And I am not the only one who notices, whether I know you in person or not – it is far felt.

I appreciate you in your fullness, whatever you may feel – angry, upset, sad, confused, frustrated, joyful, relaxed, easy going, hopeful, faithful, loving, or any other variation.

I love that you are dedicated to parenting in a way that honors you and your child, from the inside out.  That you love enough to keep going, start over, try again, seek resources, and appreciate whatever possible when moments are tough and your commitment to make the most of the present.

I appreciate you and I thank you for continuing to subscribe to this email list, even though I haven’t sent a note in quite a while!

I have been ‘within’ enjoying family and adjusting to lovely changes. In November the children and I moved to southern Missouri with my partner, Michael. I have been joyfully practicing Parent Talk and will be offering classes very soon (look towards the end of next week for a special sign up just for subscribers).  To add to the excitement I am expecting a fourth child in September!  I have been spending a fair amount of time resting and reflecting… now I’m back.  I trust Life is providing you ample opportunities for reflection also.    I look forward to connecting with you again soon!

Much Love,
Amy

A few days ago I joined three close friends, who are also mothers, in a healing session.   What came to me was a profound reminder of taking time to simply sit down and take care of ourselves.  Different than in the standard ways, yet complimentary.

Enjoy…

In the beginning as I set the intention to receive I felt guided to flow a light of forgiveness session for all of us.

An initial insight was about taking moments to center, ground, focus, heal in the midst of our lives… a visual of sitting in the center of the room, hands in peaceful prayer position, eyes closed with family coming to value these moments we go within…much like physical nourishment, this being nourishment for the soul and us taking the time to do it whenever we’re “hungry.”

Truly we are the example and the more we do this whenever we feel moved in whatever context we are in the more we give them permission to do the same, instead of worry about what others are thinking of us… tuning in, tuning in, tuning in…

Take whatever moments you need today to simply tune into you for the harmony of the entire family

In this series I will highlight some really simple ways you can honor your child and yourself. When these facets of life are honored a good portion of “problems” will not ever make it to “problem” status.

Simple Way to Honor Yourself and Your Child #10

Trust.  Or commit to developing trust. When parents choose to consider the idea and feeling of trust rather than fearing what might happen, a portal opens.  It’s as if the offerer of unlimited possibilities comes out of the woodwork in wait for you to simply trust that an answer is available.

Possibly it’s an answer of how to handle a disagreement between yourself and your co-parent.  Maybe it’s an answer to a consistent lack of sleep or a short fuse with a child.  Trusting that the answer exists means it has a way to be received by you.  When we feel like we cannot believe in an answer we cannot see or grasp anything outside of our current thought or feeling.

In a broader sense, trust is looking at things in a different light.  Instead of believing that people are not trustworthy one can trust that people will be people.  Certain people may have certain habits or patterns but anyone can change and children certainly will change as they grow.

Trust also allows for a brighter light to shine.  Trust that you are just who you need to be right now (and the same goes for your child and partner), trust that what is happening in the world has great potential to give way for a more pleasant experience for all – starting with one’s inner experience.

How can you trust in yourself, your child, humanity, and the Universe?  Start with what you already trust and stretch a bit to widen your circle of trust.

In this series I highlight some really simple ways you can honor your child and yourself. When these facets of life are honored a good portion of “problems” will not ever make it to “problem” status.

Apologize. Forgive. Love. The process of responsibility can feel and look many ways.  Some people feel like they say they’re sorry for everything and guilt still hangs with them.  Others feel like saying sorry comes across as fake unless someone tries to make up for what went “wrong.”  Regardless of where you stand you can look at the process in a new light at any time.

Parents and children alike can only do their best in any given moment.  If it could be any different, it would.  The process of responsibility exists for the purpose of growth and expansion within an individual and a relationship.

The first step is to acknowledge that you are sorry.  Start with saying it to yourself and your Source of Life (internally or out loud).  Then to your child or partner or other involved (if applicable).

The next step is a quick move to forgiveness to release the hold the bad feeling has on you and the other.  Anyone who says I’m sorry wants and deserves forgiveness, instantly. That includes you forgiving you.  Say it out loud and feel what forgiveness feels like: Freedom.

Next step, Love.  If the situation can be remedied, then make amends.  If it’s a matter of talking roughly to yourself or your child simply take a breath and adjust your tone.  You only have the moment you’re in and a promise to change later puts relief in a distant place not accessible right now.

Practice the process of responsibility with yourself and your children and watch tension and conflict melt away.

In this series I highlight some really simple ways you can honor your child and yourself. When these facets of life are honored a good portion of “problems” will not ever make it to “problem” status.

Simple Way to Honor Your Child and Yourself #2

Follow and embrace life’s natural rhythm – expansion, contraction, stillness… expansion, contraction, stillness...

You can easily get in touch with this rhythm through bringing attention to your breath.  As you inhale your lungs expand, as you exhale your lungs contract, and right in between before you inhale again is an ever present space of stillness from which everything manifests.

What does this have to do with honoring yourself and your child?

When you choose to embrace life’s rhythm you bring your child and yourself into harmony with the deepest part of you, your child, and the world.

You might start by observing the activities of your family to see what rhythm is present.  It is there and does not need to be re-created, but rather nourished so it fits in line with your overall focus.

Expanding activities bring about growth, exploration, or vigor and excitement in you and your child while contracting activities bring about introspection, quiet contemplation, or a sense of relaxation.  The stillness represents a rest period or peaceful transition to another activity to continue the rhythm.

How are you already honoring yourself and your child through life’s natural rhythm and how can you nourish what already exists to enhance your lives?

Determining a focus is important to big and little businesses alike.

Everything is built on relationship and it’s all interwoven in a way that is greatly influenced by what standards are at the center of the business: the vision or mission statement.

How does that apply to parenting?  The parent-child relationship is the most unique human combination on the planet and while it doesn’t come with a manual per se, honing your focus is an essential ingredient for a harmonious result.

Similar to childbirth and the idea that if one has focal point or sense of center it is easier to move through contractions; it is also easier to move through parenthood when you have a clear focus.

To create your own vision/mission statement for your parent-child relationship you can ask yourself the following questions:

1. Why did I become a parent?
2. How do I want to experience the act of parenting my child(ren)?
3. What do I want my child to get out of our relationship?
4. How do I want my child to experience me as a parent?
5. What strengths do I bring to the parenting role?

As you answer the questions allow yourself to dream big and really allow yourself to answer the questions honestly.  Write as much as you need to. Include actions steps you know you an take to fulfill your mission. Trust that new and affirming steps will present themselves along the way.

When you’ve completed the exercise craft a focus for yourself.  Your focus is unique to you and your family and the purpose is to have a central theme that you operate within and from.  You might not know how you’ll accomplish your mission in all moments, but simply having it to access and draw upon gives you a valuable resource in your parenting toolbox.

An example of a family focus can be as simple as the one my children and I came up with:  Stop. Think of Love.  That simple phrase reminds us to be loving to one another, even when conflict arises.

A slightly more elaborate example of a parenting focus could be:

Through my own strength, sensitivity, and desire to be the best parent I can be, I commit to continually develop acceptance and encouragement of myself and my children and to be open to unlimited possibilities while I make the most of parenting now, in every moment.

Whatever you come up with, whether it is one word or 100, allow it to support you as a parent and know that by honing your focus you are creating a powerful intention for your parenting experience.  Simply take action towards that intention in ways that feel in line with it.  )